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~ walking through life on life's terms

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Monthly Archives: February 2017

Nothing to Say

26 Sunday Feb 2017

Posted by kathyd65 in That's Life

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Health, Life, Personal experience, Reality, truth

Nothing to Say

If you read Sick, then you’ll understand this. I have bronchitis. I’m pretty sure that’s all it is. However, an aching head makes thinking more difficult, makes focusing a chore.

So today I did neither. We ate breakfast out and stopped by Costco, using all the energy I had in reserve. After we put away our groceries I dozed on the couch.

My loving husband and I played Cashflow 101. I got out of the rat race first, and I managed to increase my cash flow by $50,000 first to win the game.

More rest.

We built the remainder of a Lego Christmas train. The flatcar and the caboose. And all the tiny Christmas gifts. We ran it around the track a few times (we sprung for the motor accessory). It’s the coolest.

I coughed too long and too hard. I’m going to bed early. Too much effort to try and watch a movie.

Tomorrow I’ll visit Urgent Care at the request of my husband. Maybe the nurses can help speed up the healing.

And that’s about it. I’ll write something more entertaining tomorrow. Thanks for stopping by.

Sick

25 Saturday Feb 2017

Posted by kathyd65 in That's Life

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Tags

Health, Life, Personal experience, Poetry, truth

Sick

Fatigue. Stiff joints. Feeling cold in a warm room.

Deep in the ear canal, an itch I can’t scratch.

Dry, burning eyeballs. Nasal passages blocked.

Feeling the pressure build as the blood pounds in my temples.

Throat swelling shut, becoming difficult to swallow.

Benched indefinitely. Against my will. Without my consent.

So much to do. No energy to do it.

Snippity. Irritable. Cranky. Sorry.

Damnit.

Zzzzzzzzzz.

 

 

 

Solitary

24 Friday Feb 2017

Posted by kathyd65 in Fiction, Writing

≈ 18 Comments

Tags

100 words, Fiction, Life, Personal experience, Story

Solitary

ff-prompt-2017-02-24-sarah_potter-january-snowfall-nighttime

After midnight. Can’t sleep. That committee between my ears making all manner of ruckus. Funny the things that seem urgent in the boardroom of the mind. Rehashing unresolved regrets. Organizing tomorrows to do list. I toss. I turn. ENOUGH. Rolling quietly out of bed, grabbing my robe, I head to the porch with pad of paper and pen. The porch offers solitude and a beautiful view. The world is quiet, all sound absorbed by this mantle of pristine, unmarred snow. It covers everything. Setting pad and pen aside, I sit quietly instead, meditating on the streetlight’s glow. The committee disperses.

—

I hope you enjoyed reading this, as I enjoyed writing it. Thanks to Rochelle for continuing to post the weekly 100 words photo prompt for Friday Fictioneers. Special thanks to Sarah Potter for her lovely photograph.

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She forgot her place

23 Thursday Feb 2017

Posted by kathyd65 in Fiction, That's Life

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Fiction, Life, Memories, Personal experience, Relationships, truth

She forgot her place

A 15 year old criminal, guilty of grand theft auto, placed in a home with other delinquent girls. Alone, afraid, no confidence. Her experience taught her no one was trustworthy.

But the girls reached out and slowly she responded. Shared a little of her story, allowed herself to be vulnerable. Still shy, quiet, and fearful, she knew her place.

The head girl offered the make over and the others encouraged her to accept. She tried to politely beg off but when the head girl expressed hurt, rejection, she gave in.

They accepted her, she thought, made her pretty, fawned over her, boosted her self worth. She hadn’t experienced this kind of sisterhood in a while, she liked the attention, the ego boost. She felt more confident, more worthwhile.

Her newfound confidence and happiness, a gift they bestowed upon her, somehow backfired, caused the other girls to feel threatened. They turned on her, called her a bitch, accused her of being stuck up. Confused and hurt, she tried to make it right, removed the make up, messed up the hair, but it didn’t help.

She’d simply forgotten her place in this world. That would not happen again.

How Well?

22 Wednesday Feb 2017

Posted by kathyd65 in That's Life

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Life, Memories, Personal experience, Relationships, truth

How Well?

It’s easy to convince yourself that you really know someone. At least, speaking for myself, it was easy for me. Probably easier to believe that you know your parent better than most people you know – I mean, who else have you had a relationship with since birth, but your mom or dad? (If either one of them stuck around following the blessed event, of course)

I never gave it any thought growing up – did I know my mom? She was my mom. Certainly it should go without saying that I knew her, and well. When her ovarian cancer returned, I gave it plenty of thought. After reading a book about dealing with cancer I made the time, I interviewed my mom. My intention was to help her to realize her part in the grand scheme of things, to help her find a reason to fight harder to live. Instead,  I realized in taking the time to get to know her, I didn’t really know her as well as I thought. I also learned that she’d been dealt a pretty raw hand before she ever reached puberty.

After she died, all I had gathered during the ‘interview’ was all I had. Before she died, I liked to tell myself that I knew my mother better than my brother did – but I didn’t. How could I? I knew a few things different than he did, that’s all, but he spent his adult life being a part of her life and I didn’t. There are some things she and I had in common. And I did pay attention, much more attention in those last three years. I am grateful for the time we spent together, the wounds we healed, and the new memories we shared.

I realized that if I want to be a part of someone’s life, I have to do my part. I know the phone goes both ways. So does the mail, the email, the Facebook. I think I’d prefer to get to know someone better the old fashioned way – face to face, or on the phone – voice to voice. And be forewarned, I’ll be taking notes.

I’m just saying, if I think I know someone well, maybe – just maybe – I don’t. But I can change that. Starting today.

Savoring the Written Word

21 Tuesday Feb 2017

Posted by kathyd65 in Writing

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Tags

Life, truth

Savoring the Written Word

Usually when I read a book that interests me I devour it, like a person who feels better after several days of illness. Or a woman right before her monthly cycle, eating way more than her own body weight. When I read, I sprint through the pages, the content flying by my eyes, the words a blur. I’ve recognized that as I get closer to the end of a story, I race to that finish line, as if I am competing. Which makes the book entirely new to me if I read it again later, because I didn’t really absorb it.

This time I am reading a book slowly, deliberately. Savoring each word and digesting the author’s paragraphs, as if eating a bit of rich perfect cheesecake or an exquisite Belgium chocolate truffle. I’ve decided to read only a chapter each day, and her chapters are only three or four pages, but dense with wisdom.

I picked up the book I’m currently reading because I’ve read one other by this author: Anne Lamott. That other book: Plan B. That book was recommended by a friend who knows me well, and I enjoyed the light and humorous narration with some life experience thrown in. It’s my favorite kind of writing these days – real honest words, with a touch of comedy and no unnecessary drama.

My current reading -Bird By Bird – is Anne’s HOW-TO book for writers. And it’s not what one would expect. Well, it’s not what I expected. See, I took a few classes in college because I want to be a writer… like Anne. I signed up for American Literature, Creative Writing, and a third class I cannot recall. I dropped them all within the first four weeks. Because I wanted to relay my experience…I didn’t want to dissect books. ‘What was the author thinking when he wrote that piece? Which character was the protagonist? What was the meaning of the moon shining on the wheat in the winter at midnight?’ At the time, that was not what I was looking for. I’d rather enjoy the story – fictional or non-fictional – than think about why the author wrote it. Maybe I’m missing out on that experience as well. Instead, I am getting a different kind of education – that of the non-fictional and personal variety. And lessons I didn’t expect (another favorite of mine these days: lessons in the form of leisure entertainment. I believe you can find a positive growth experience in anything if you know HOW to ‘read’ it).

Anyway – I’m reading her book. Chapter by chapter. And I’m considering what I’ve read instead of immediately diving into the next chapter. And the words mean more, and the content sticks better in my mind. I read the chapter Perfectionism twice. So I could understand how better to let go of it.

So I wrote this, to practice putting down words on paper. Spew. Walk away.

I’ll also recommend On Writing by Stephen King. He also has some great suggestions mixed in with personal life stories.

That’s all for now.

 

 

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Road Unknown

A Memoir of the Road Unknown

One Chance to See the World

The Renegade Press

Tales from the mouth of a wolf

Boitumelo “Salad” Ikaneng

I am more of a story teller than anything and, I will throw in and sprinkle some motivational personal experiences.... & Every Little Thing.

Neil MacDonald Author

A writer's journey

Ryan Lanz

Fantasy Author

Frank Solanki

If you want to be a hero well just follow me

HAWES ESCAPES

The short fiction of j hardy carroll

Sarah Doughty

Novelist, Poet, Wordsmith

Once uPUN a time...

Finding novel ways of engaging students and exploring content.

Rochelle Wisoff-Fields-Addicted to Purple

Growing older is inevitable. Growing up is optional.

Be Inspired..!!

Listen to your inner self..it has all the answers..

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Ludwig's space with some fun, some tips, some insights, some computer skills for us older folks

Your Hormone Balancing Coach

Balance Hormones and Ease Menopause Through Nutrition

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